A Lesson in English

I'm reading a play by George Bernard Shaw entitled 'Major Barbara' for my English poetry/drama class. Luckily, it is a comedy. But I would like to show you the type of writing this guy has. The play needs to be read with english accents. I didn't discover this, until there was a drunk englishman with a lot of slang in his speech.

Example:

Bill: Aw knaow you. Youre the one that took away maw girl. Youre the one that set er agen me. Well, I'm gowin to ev er aht. Not that Aw care a carse for er or you: see? Bat Aw'll let er knaow; and Aw'll let you knaow. Aw'm gowin to give her a doin thatll teach er to cat awy from me. Nah in win you and tell er to cam afore Aw cam in and kick er aht. Tekk er Bill Walker wants er. She'll knaow wot thet means; and if she keeps me witin itll be worse. You stop to jar beck at me; and Aw'll stawt on you: d'ye eah? Theres your wy. In you gow.

Now. Imagine reading an entire act with a character who talks like that. You quickly form differing voices in your head for the other characters. All with accents. All hilarious. I haven't had this much fun with a script in a long time.

Side notes: Shaw's lack of apostrophes makes me angry. And it isn't just with this character. He doesn't write them in anywhere. I think he was just lazy. I mean, Shakespeare wouldn't have gotten away with bad grammar...